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Public Housing Directory

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Due to life being super busy this week and having no volunteers for the feature, there will be no feature this week! Stay tuned for next week and feel free to DM me if you're interested in having your homestead featured in the next issue of the Tamriel Times.
IGN: @opallithia
Discord: opallithia#1386
Founder: Veldresi Enterprises
Project Manager: ESO-RP Public Housing Directory
Characters: Lelianna Velette
Posted Apr 29, 18 · OP
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ayQ5ona.png


~ THE TAMRIEL TIMES ~
no. 203.083 BETTER HOMESTEADS AND GARDENS Since 2E 565
Featuring Art 's Stomach of Ithguleoir!

“Greetings! This is Amelia Hawke with Better Homesteads and Gardens. This week, I’m here in… some dark, drippy, cave-like place… I’m actually not sure how I got here to begin with, but I sense a dark and omnipotent presence creeping at the back of my consciousness and I have a deadline to make, so I’m going to start my interview! Hello? Is anyone there? Who are you?”

“And what -is this-? A speaking mortal. Fleshspawn, yield and relent. I am that which is insatiable, deemed by the Abyss and those whom dwell in the Depths as Ithguleoir -the Immortal Leviathan.-”

“O-oh. I uh, maybe a better question is what are you? And where are we?”

“Behold, foul thing, for your hubri- What? I- I just told you, mortal. I am a Leviathan!- Ithguleoir! Immortal and resplendent in the dark, a monument to memory in the crevice of the Pit. You are in my stomach, consumed amidst the flow of ichor-”

“I… I see. Well, I have a report to finish so… I’ll just go ahead I suppose… uh, why don’t you tell me a little about your…. humble abode?”

“M-my abode? What is this...? It is Ithguleoir, the Immortal Leviathan's stomach! Ignore the backs of my teeth, I've been in the Mundex arena for a few, and I haven't had the chance to use creatia to fix the plaque buildup yet. It can be very embarrassing at times. If you look down my gullet, you can witness the rivers of bile and the veins of ichor pumping throughout my great form.”

“Q-quite the natural charm you have, here. Very rustic. Do you often get… visitors? How do people even get here? How did I get here?”

“Not many. Between you and myself, Ithguleoir, -the Immortal Leviathan-, I don't swallow many people. Standards, mostly. Be honoured, mortal. Back to your question; There were a few paltry mortals whom kept interrupting my monologues a while back. Time is meaningless when not in this foul plane of stasis. How did you get here, mortal? Simple. When a large beast becomes hungry, it searches for food. And you swam a bit too far from the coast.”

“F-food? Well, you seem like a lovely Leviathan and all, I’m certain I have no idea why more people don’t visit you! Do you put much thought into your decoration scheme for guests?”

"Of course I am lovely. I am Ithguleoir, -the Immortal Leviathan.- I've put a great deal of thought into my entrails. I really need to work on my stomach though. As I was reforming, I thought to myself, What screams BERATU VIR ALTADOON AE RLLMR GHARTOK AE MER CHIM, you know? And it just came to me. I did the tentacles myself.”

“Beratu… what? Well, that’s some exotic atmosphere, I’ll say! What are you most proud of or what is your favorite part of your… home?”

“Most proud? Well, mortal, that is simple. It would be my heart. Back when it was functioning. A mortal put an unquantifiable, for a mortal, essence of my power into it and I've had really bad heartburn ever since. I really just don't know why I formed a pathway up to it.”

“Well, that’s a good takeaway for everyone from this issue. Never build a pathway straight to your heart! Thank you for spending time with me today! If I may, erm, how… do I get out of here?”

“Did you truly believe you were going to leave, fleshspawn? You are forever bound in eternal pai- You know what? Nevermind. I'm just going to vomit you up. You should really learn context clues when having a conversation. I don't even want to eat you anymore. The second era- what a disappointment.”

FIN
IGN: @opallithia
Discord: opallithia#1386
Founder: Veldresi Enterprises
Project Manager: ESO-RP Public Housing Directory
Characters: Lelianna Velette
Posted May 6, 18 · OP
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Love the idea!
Posted Jun 9, 18
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Many thanks! I've been taking a brief break from the featured homesteads, but hopefully they will be making a comeback soon.
IGN: @opallithia
Discord: opallithia#1386
Founder: Veldresi Enterprises
Project Manager: ESO-RP Public Housing Directory
Characters: Lelianna Velette
Posted Jun 11, 18 · OP
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